It's dark in here.

So the demon book has been shelved yet again. This happens over and over again. I just think it's awfully close to my heart and makes it hard to work on. I think I'll take a step back for a while, maybe try to get some solid outlining and notes done on it, and then start up again later.

Instead, I'm working on a few other things. I'm thinking of starting the revisions on Beauty, the novel I started for NaNoWriMo (which I might just try again this year, depending on work). I'm also working on the roach story.

Didn't place in the contest I'd entered it in, didn't even get a rejection letter. Poo. So I'm working on fleshing it out more (and changing some things which I now find really cringe-worthy). Once I do, I'll submit it around for real. Right now it's about 1700 words. I'd like to get it to 3000, but I don't think that is possible unless I continue past the ending I now have. If I do that, I could very well double it. I'm not sure. I'll have to add in all the little things I've got in my head (and I did quite a bit of that tonight), and see where it stands.

So that's where things stand now. More later, when more things happen, as always.

So I didn't get anything written over the weekend. I did send out the prologue to the people that have asked to be on my email list. I also did a lot of messing around on various tarot sites (adding 4 neat decks to my amazon.com wish list in the process), trying to figure that part out. Had a good conversation with erlking about that. Then he wanted a physical description of the main character (who will now be Josephine instead of Josefine, as I wasn't sure I liked Josefine anymore, and everyone seems to agree with that).

So I've spent the rest of the evening trying to figure out what the heck Josephine looked like. It was about 11pm that I got the idea to browse pictures of hairdye boxes, being the weirdo that I am. But I did find one that I rather like...

( josephine... )

So there was at least that much accomplished. Troll dear, if you'd like I can send you more of a writeup of her tomorrow. Tonight I'm beat.

So yeah. No writing done this weekend. Not likely to get any done over the week. So slackful. But, instead of writing actual text, I will try to document any ideas or concepts that I do have, so I don't forget them. Next weekend, other than doing wash on Sunday, I shall try to work on this for most of the weekend. I might try to work on it during the week before work, but I'm usually fairly slug-like before work each day, so no promises there.

Ok. Time to go hit some Jane Austen and sleep.

I've been listening to a lot of music lately, letting the stuff in my head dictate what I hear.

I'm listening to a lot of Scarlet's Walk and Group Therapy, but those two albums seem to have worked their way into the soundtrack of my life. There's definately some songs on each that really fit with what I'm trying to work on, though.

I'm also listening to The Cure's Disintegration a lot. Like, nothing else in the last 36 hours, playing even while I sleep. I don't know why, the need to listen to this just hit me out of the blue. I've pinned down part of it, in that a character that will be in this demon-book has some strong traits of phae-in-high-school. Disintegration was a CD I used to borrow from my friend Ryan in the ... late 10th grade, I believe, and listen to a lot. Then I got it a few months after that. I still have that CD. The cover is cracked, and when I ripped it so that I could listen to it on the computer, I can hear the scratches on the CD in the MP3s. I love this CD...

I think I might need to get David Bowie's Heathen, as well. I heard a song off of it on launchcast last night, and it was sooo good and just fit right in with everything. In fact, I think I'll go download that one song right now...

Here's the "demon list" playlist out of my mp3 player:

( la la la )

I haven't updated this in almost a week!

It's a bit odd having a normal journal and a writing journal, esp with almost all of the people I have friended on here, I have on my other journal as well. I don't want to fill this up with personal details that people have already read somewhere else, and I don't want to bore people on my normal journal with details about my writing (details and going on and on and blah blah blah). But sometimes I forget.

Not a lot actually going on, but things are about to start happening. I have totally finished the stolen story, which has been renamed "A Shot in the Dark". It's printed, but I screwed up a few things manuscript-wise, so I'll be reprinting it, either tonight or over the weekend, and mailing it off no later than monday. Whee!

Last weekend I also started in on the demon story for real. I just meant to sit down and try to redo the parts I'd already written to work with how I wanted it to be now...and ended up spewing out a whole bunch of, I think, pretty good stuff. Tho I've already thought of things that I want in there that I forgot to put.

It's going to be long, too. It's already over 2000 words, and it feels like a bare beginning. I shake my fist at things I wish would be short stories that just want to be novels. I think I'll work on it more this weekend, and if it still feels so confined, I'll rewrite the beginning and start calling it the prolouge. Is that spelled right? Eh, I don't care.

So yeah, things are happening. I still can't work on my writing after I get home from work, too drained, or before work, too lazy. I need to fix one of these two things. I could be getting a hell of a lot more done if I worked on it more than just on the weekends.

I'm already working on the music that will be the soundtrack to the demon story. Some Concrete Blonde, like "Your Llorona" and "Angel", Depeche Mode's acoustic "Personal Jesus"...U2's "Running to Stand Still" and "Trip Through Your Wires." Oh! Also, I got my quicky MP3 copy of trollmusic's cd Fixate in the mail, and not only is it super-wonderful, two of the songs are SO going on the soundtrack for the story ("Song of Thanks" and "Dusk Fell Over You"). Such good stuff. (*shameless plug* you can buy his cd on his website, or listen to MP3s after I upload some this weekend *end shameless plug*)

I should post some of the demon story here. I guess I will post some of the results on Sunday night, either some of the rough stuff I have, or the new prolouge. Tho it might upset fallenicon a bit...it upset me a bit to right, but I did. You'll see why (and I'll send it to you sooner if you're interested).

Ok, cold fingers does not make for easy typing. I am going to find food.

I'm a slacker! Woo!

As if any of you didn't know that already.

I haven't done any more revising on the stolen story since Sunday. I know what I want to do to it, though, I just haven't actually sat down and done it. Maybe I'll get to it tonight. If not, well, there's always the weekend. I will feel confident that I've acheived my goal because the story is done, and it's only the very last section that still needs some work. But I did finish it.

I've started on the new story, too. Well, the new/old story. It's something that I started writing years and years ago, and never did finish it. When I decided I wanted to write something dark fantasy/horrorish set in ABQ, I remembered that story (which is about a demon), and how it was never completed. I've decided to totally rewrite it and set it here. I think it will work well. I've already started with a new beginning, it just sprang out of nowhere (at work, even), so I wrote it down. I think I like where it's going. It needs a name, though. For now, I'll just call it the demon story.

I found a new author's website/blog from a link that was posted in Neil Gaiman's journal. It was the link to Will Shetterly's blog. He's just started it recently, but it looks promising. His website has author stuff. On the page "Pithy Advice for Writers" there are two great lines:

Dare to fail; that's why God made revisions.

Write to please yourself first and others second, and you'll never fail.

And with that, I think I'll go get ready for work.

Ok, so today I'd promised myself I'd try to finish the Stolen story, since I've only got two weeks left to have it totally ready, and I didn't work on it at all last weekend.

I sat down at the computer about...4, I think, and proceeded to waste an hour and a half on distractions (watched a movie, read LJ, chatted with fallenicon, did google searches).

I was starting to get really fed up with myself, thinking that I wasn't going to be able to do this after all. fallenicon suggested I give myself time in March, since Feburary was a short month, but I don't think so...

So I put on some fairly bitter music (playlist will follow), turned off all the lights, lit a few candles, and smoked a clove. I pulled out my scribble book and jotted down a few ideas, but then didn't need to worry about it.

Stuff just came. Good stuff, too, a part I wasn't sure how to write. A good lead to the end.

I did about 1200 words tonight, which puts me a bit over 4,000. I also have only about two more scenes to write til the end. I think I'll try to write after work this week, and if that doesn't happen, I'll finish it next weekend.

zevhonith, did you get the copy I sent you as an attachment? Did you look at it?

Now, to read...

( tonight's music )

(In which Phae rambles a bit about what she wants to write, what she wants to accomplish, and the next project after "Stolen")

( And so forth! )

Added some people from phaedrine to this friends list, since I'm going to be posting stuff up here friends-only, and want them to see. :)

Ok, I suck. I totally forgot to put in a key part of chapter four...better go do that now. Dumb dumb dumb. See what happens when I don't pay any attention to my outline?!?

Another night of much work. If I have some more of these, I might actually finish this thing. ;)

Managed 2701 words tonight, which brings me to 14,595 in total. I'm 2600 some words in to chapter four, I'll probably write another thousand or so on it and finish that up.

Next, they travel to the North to meet with the Dragon Seer, then starts the 2nd part of the book, in which they gather what they need to bring down Melantha, and in the process try to regain Ellen's lost humanity (which I think is starting to show more in chapter 4, but is going to need some revising later to really say what I want to about it...worries for later).

Now I am to bed. La!

So today, I had a good day in general all day (as is detailed in phaedrine). Then I put on moulin rouge and sat down to write.

At one point, I stopped and made brownies.

Then I put on the Crow.

Now I'm going to bed. Today I've not only finished chapter two, not only broken the 10,000 word mark, but I've almost broken 12,000. I'm at 11,826, 4043 of that written in the last 5 hours.

Tomorrow, I'm going to try for the same.

What's the plan? Finish chapter three. In my mind, it's being called "the chapter with no dialouge". But that's ok, how much can you really say in a chapter that spans a hundred or so years?

Chapter four will be "chapter of princes and freedom".

After that...I'll have to take a look at my redone outline. On the orignal, it didn't go too much past them getting out of the castle. On the new timeline, that's only the first third or so.

La!

I did get a lot done last night. Not quite to the end of chapter 2, but nearly. I'm def. going to finish that and write all of chapter 3 today. My only other plans are to vacuum the floor and go food shopping, and they can even wait. :) I will write lots and lots!

If, by some miracle, I can even get through chapter 4 today, that will put me nearly all the way caught up. We'll see what happens.

I'll post stuff here as I finish it.

Alrighty then. Just spent some time adding people as friends. I wasn't going to bother too much with that, as many of the people that were friend-of, I had listed as a friend in my normal journal...but then I decided that I was going to post excerpts here, but post them friends-only. So all of a sudden, it made a difference.

So yeah. If you want to read my NaNoWriMo work in progress, add me and I'll most likely add you back.

My normal ramblings, however, will continue to be open to everyone. Woo. I bet you're all so thrilled, huh? ;)

Ok. I'll post my prologue here, then it's to writing for me, for at least the next hour or two. Gonna see if I can double my word count tonight.

So here we are, on the first day of November, on the first day of NaNoWriMo.

Haven't written anything yet. That can't be helped, tho. There was no way I was going to be able to stay up til after midnight last night to get started, even if it was a 10 word start.

This morning, I barely had time to get ready beforing having to leave for work at 6:20am. So that was out.

I don't think I'll get any done during work, but who knows. Maybe during my lunchbreak, since we're sort of having 2 lunches today.

I will, however, sit down and work on some this evening, before literaryseer comes over for Bebop. And maybe some more before bed. Tomorrow, some for sure, and lots on Sunday. Sunday will actually be a day used for making up for today and tomorrow. :) Then starting Monday, I'm going to try for a regularish schedule of writing during the week, and a spaz of writing on the weekends.

That's all.

Oh wait. One last thing. I now have a title.

Beauty: A Tale Of Vengeance

Actually did some character work today. Go me! Not a lot, because I was actually working for most of the day, but I did some during one of my breaks.

I'm trying to decide how much to age my main character while she's locked in the castle. I know I want her to be about 15 when she gets put in there, and that about 100 years will pass in the outside world, but I don't want her to be 15 at the end. I'm thinking that she has to learn quite a bit of the dragon magic before she stops aging...but how long before that happens? 5 years? That would put her at a good age, maturity-wise. Hmm....

Think I'm going to go read. This is one of the last nights I can enjoy guilt-free reading! Eeek!

Ok, I got fed up with blogger tonight, and converted everything over to a new LJ.

I'm up way past my bedtime, but I finally got the style the way I want it, the colors similiar to my writing page, and all my back entries reposted here (backdated). At least there weren't that many. I've also gotten all my writing/book related interested listed, and some userpics uploaded. I hate only being able to use 3 pictures. Once I've got the money flowing again, I'll have to pay for this journal for a short time, just so I can upload more! :)

I had fun listing the "current music" for each entry as something off my current playlist. ;) Silly, aren't I?

Much talk with Britt tonight about story/plot/etc. Still have questions on the ending. Still need a title. Other than that, things are looking good. It's truly going to be dark, feministish fantasy (is feministish a word? It should be...)

Ok. Way tired. Must sleep. Must wake in 7 hours. Must leave minutae about normal life to normal journal. This is writing stuff only!

Ok, I hasn't even started yet and I'm already having a crisis. :P

I'm trying to decide if I want to pitch the YA bit and write it normal fantasy. Well, dark fantasy.

See, there's things I'd like to be in there that I'm not sure I can tone down enough for YA. A big part of that is the ending. I know how I want it to end...sorta...but I don't know why. Vengence plays a very large part of what happens....It's possible that it won't be a very happy ending, though, because the girl becomes very bitter and stuff while she's locked up. I'm still pretty unsure on the ending, really. I know what has to happen, I'm just not quite sure how or why.

See, the orignal story, that I wrote on a whim back in like the 12th grade, went something like this: "Sleeping Beauty wasn't really asleep. She was locked in the castle with the dragon, and she was awake the whole time. She became friends with the dragon, who used her magic to keep them alive. After 100 years, a prince came to wake the sleeping beauty and live happily ever after. Instead, they killed him and ate him. Free at last, they flew off into the sky, and lived happily ever after." So yeah.

Last year, I was doing a lot of outlining on this concept, because I thought I could stretch it in to a neat dark fantasy novel. This is the result of that. As you can see, I was unsure about the ending even then. (Many of the names and some of the concepts have changed since then, but it's a pretty fair outline still, at least for the first 1/2 or so and then the very (unknown) end).

A few months ago, I thought I could turn this YA with no problems, but now I'm not so sure. I think I'd rather it be a dark fantasy thing, actually. I don't know...meh. I think I'll think on it for another day or two. I'm leaning towards the darker stuff, tho. I might just leave the ending questions until I get there.

Been working on Stolen off and on over the last week. I've been revising as I go, so it doesn't seem like I've done much, tho I've added almost another thousand words to it. Gotta keep working. There's so much more to say... I'm tempted to just spew it out and then revise later, but that really goes against the grain. I don't know. Maybe I'll try that over the next few days, and then sit and revise sometime next week, and see where that gets me.

Redid the site tonight, as well as the main written dark page. More to do, that's for sure, but it was a good start.


I think bed now.

No writing today. No work on the site today, either, but that's ok. Didn't spend a whole lot of time on the computer. Did a lot of housework, reading, and took a friend to pick up his car.

I've been doing a lot of thinking though, and I think it's good thinking. Roaches might start with a different POV, which is new, because I had orignally intended on it just being a single POV. It keeps growing...


I'm itching to finish Gaidin. Yeah, it's fanfic, but I like to think of it as practice. I could use it, and any writing I do is better than no writing, I guess. I need to email manda what I need from her, character-wise. I should probably do the same with both Lindy and Troll, as they'll be in it, too....still trying to decide on one of the big story points, though. For the time being, I'm writing around it, but it's really annoying to not be able to figure out what happened to Mac, why he left and died. It's essential to the story that he does both, I just need to straighten out the "why" of it all. Meh.


Tired now. Gonna read and cook dinner for the boy. And eat some cherries. I love cherry season.

Ok. Took Roaches out yesterday and really looked at it. I've got about 600 words on that, too. I hate it. All of it. It sounds childish, and not even like my style. It also doesn't sound like the story that I have in my head. It sounds like it's trying to get there....but it's not. So today, I'm throwing the whole thing out. I'm going to take a blank notebook with me to work and do some outlining on it, and try to decide what I want to say with it, and where I want to go. I also need to work on some character sketches. Usually I come up with characters first, these people inside my head that won't leave me alone, and I have to figure out some sort of plot for them. This time, I know what I want the plot to be...but everything else seems rather cardboard.

More later, when I've done some work.